Why are we still dealing with Sex & Violence? These two arenas seem to occupy both our most heinous crimes as well as our most lurid fantasies.

The deeply ingrained issues we face today as modern humans have their roots in our older evolution.   As long as we have bodies and obey the laws of being an organism, we will have to come to terms with our sexuality as well as our violent, animal natures.

Nature does not waste when she lays down brushstrokes, each adaptation was designed to make us better. When the hominids starting growing big brains, I would argue the then psychological adaptations aimed to evolve consciousness faster. With the advent of tool-use, we quickly began to absolutely dominate our environment. A bifurcation within the animal kingdom was underway.

Image: pinterest.com

Turns out that man is the most dangerous animal.

For most creatures when it comes to violence, they will usually error on the side of caution. This is because they don’t want to get violent and activate their fight or flight response unless it is absolutely necessary. Beasts will follow the path of least resistance when offered as they are  energy misers. Combat with another organism is quite costly, and only a small majority of species (predators) specialize in it.

The theater of battlefield for evolution had changed for us. Now it is not when your body is devoured; but when your mind is. The leaders of men throughout history have realized this, and channeled evolutions’ programmed proclivities in us accordingly.

You have to realize that an information “war” (to perhaps overuse violent imagery here to drive the point home) has been waged against the human mind as soon as we decided to leave the nomadic hunter/gatherer stage and enter sedentary civilization.

When you have a lot of people living in close proximity for the first time, and sharing resources and mates, one has to draw boundaries.

In order to control civilization, the top mind-predators realized they had to control the average man at the source of all his love and strife. They accomplished this by delineating boundaries around sexuality, and thus women. This is the classic social mammal move for a dominator group governed by the strongest males. This meant religion, ideology, and laws surrounding all of the relationships in this most intimate unit of the group: the family.

Family lines and mating partnerships further influenced the rules of violence within the tribe, against kind, and without the tribe against “foreign” genetic carriers.

As far as evolution was concerned, our new mental and semantic activity was the swiftest route to maintain the fidelity of the procession of generations.

Image: cavemenworld.com

These two biggest shadows of the past, the management of Sex and Violence, still haunt us.

Sex will always be important as long as we have bodies for procreation.

Violence was almost always necessary in the realm of Darwin’s “tooth & claw”, and eventually for social omnivorous apes: for hunting, war, and extinguishing other genetic threats.

Sex and violence in our monkey minds are often strongly associated: both are vulgar acts that involve “violence of action” and have intense desire/passion attached to them.

Lust and Rage can go hand in hand, bloodlust or carnal lust . . . for evidence see your ancestors killing all the males in a rival tribe and then dragging their females by the hair back to their caves.

Image: gnd124groupblog.wordpress.com

We don’t need sex and violence to be inexorably linked. Evolution has given us the discriminating tool to separate them in meaning and action: our mind. Empathy will go a long way in challenging our paradigms as mammals wired to aggressively pursue mates (I am looking at you guys). If you need to learn about how to act nonviolently gents, my first stop would be the most trusted woman in your life.

Violence and sex are still parts of us and amazing tools that we will continue to need moving forward into a new evolution.

Everybody loves sex right? Sexy times will stay around long after we have developed technologies such as cloning and real test tube babies.

However, we especially don’t have to use violence on each other anymore.  I will concede that self-defense will always exist until a radical evolution occurs. You can never fully trust everyone to follow the rules I suppose.

We need to de-weaponize violence and stop using it against each other. It’s one of our best weapons, a man with thinking violent intent. It is also the most ancient tendency programmed – there was a time when anything moving that was not your body was considered a survival threat.

We just need to use these natural forces responsibly by exerting more control over ourselves and our intentions.  No conscious being truly wants violence, especially because it’s so energy costly. We are bred to enjoy it through sports, rites of passage, and tradition – but none of us truly like it.


This information model of MATE! and/or KILL! is outdated now. We have reached a critical mass in the human collective consciousness that yearns for balance.

The age of the BEAST is over, the age of AGGRESSION is over . . . or they must be unless we are to repeat Earth’s ever-moving life history and face the final extinction event.

The Masculine aspect of humanity has been on a long bender into the dominator style. It has given us wondrous feats of science, technology, and civilization, but shown no better way to relate to each other’s bodies. May we all heal these deep wounds.